vicious circles

I only told two people,
But then they told two people,
Then they each told two people,
And so on and so on and so on.
I don’t make the news I just report it,
So I said in my own defense,
But that really doesn’t cut it,
Just justification for being an asp.
Who am I to judge someone else,
Who am I to spread gossip true or not,
Just to compensate for my own insecurities,
Patchwork job to cover up my failings.
On and on it goes these cycles of samsara,
Vicious circles of hate and vengeance,
Twisting and turning and destroying,
Whirlwind twisting out of control.
I have to stop this at once,
Make the choice to end this cycle,
Take responsibility for my own karma,
Begin living a righteous life.
The Eightfold Path sounds so easy,
Seems so simple and plain,
But as it happens it is not as it seems,
It is the most difficult path to tread.
The Eightfold Way seems dull and uninteresting,
But interesting will be the downfall of me,
Unless I adhere to sense and caution,
Unless I choose right over wrong.
Right views right words right actions,
Just three of the eight but plenty for me,
Those three alone will take all my effort,
And it begins today and it begins now.

sanity assassins

Rainy cold dreary September day—
I told my daughter it was gonna rain yesterday, but she didn’t believe me.
Just something about the wind, something in the air yesterday,
Humid and windy--but I could just feel the onset of rain.
I imagine our ancestors had a name for it,
As they did for so many things that we have forgotten.
Summer’s last gasp as autumn leeches into the air,
Cold rain showers sent to pummel our spirits,
And prepare us for the long frozen nights of winter.

I had to cut and run, not willing to shoulder the blame,
Not believing that my superiors would do what needed to be done.
They reward bad behavior and mediocrity,
No reason to rise above when everyone else is sinking.
Everyone thinks I am just showing off, just being nitpicky,
But what is it that they are doing here?
No one owes them a livelihood, owes them anything,
But their sense of entitlement is so apparent,
And they bide their time and pay their dues.
Some day one of them is gonna run this place,
God forbid but someone might just screw up
And put one of them in a position of power.

The payment will be refused and returned,
According to the lady at CountryBlight,
But that was over a week ago.
I can’t send them what I don’t have,
Although they have it/had it just last week,
And perhaps it is now in the mail.
They hit me with fees and fines,
But I have to just sit and wait,
Because my check’s in the mail.
I’ll turn right back around,
Send it right back to them,
But they’ll keep calling,
Keep right on reporting me to the credit bureaus,
All the while the check’s in the mail somewhere.